I turned 45 last week. I took the day off work to be alone. Reflect and set new goals for myself, even though I woke up feeling anxious, as I always do on my birthday. So, to combat the feeling of dread that was taking over my heart, I decided it was best to get... Continue Reading →

I am still struggling with drinking. But now it is just annoying.  It’s there, and won’t go away. I feel strong because I am so aware of the problem, yet weak because I’m apparently still clueless as to how to solve it. I go for days and days without a drink and then I slip.... Continue Reading →

It has been months now since I have written a new blog post. I have no excuses. Have I been drinking? Sometimes… Have I had an occasional slip up? Yes. Do I feel ok? For the most part yes… and for the most part no. More than likely I haven’t written because I feel guilt.... Continue Reading →

I am a Self-Help Junkie. Surprising…. I know! If you were to look at my book shelf, I probably own more than 50 inspirational books on how to be a better me. My quick fix for most of my problems, whether it be drinking, my marriage, parenting, my weight, finances or how to keep a... Continue Reading →

As all the sparkle and glitter settles from New Year celebrations and resolutions, the self challenges and new commitments become a list that holds fresh hopes and repetitive failures. I started to drink again. Sifting through the happiness and joy of everyone’s New Year posts I find myself bored of seeing it all.  Everything looks... Continue Reading →

I thought I was pregnant … but I AM NOT. I’ve thought I was pregnant many times… but I WASN’T. When will this end. This dream. Hope. Expectation. Wish. Disappointment. Dread. Truth. I cannot get pregnant…. naturally. I know I am not alone, and that there are millions of other women like me, but when... Continue Reading →

6 months alcohol free has come and gone! This picture, when I saw it, truly symbolized to me the whole process of the Journey that I've been on this past 6 months. Slowing down and taking care of myself and those around me. And trying to bring alive what was once dead. It can be... Continue Reading →

Recently it was asked of me, if I had to bet on mine and my families success, would I? Meaning, would I invest?  Wager? Gamble? Place a bet? Am I in it to win it? Well, many from the outside looking in, would run away as fast as they could.  Clear to them that we... Continue Reading →

I lie here. Broken. But this time I am literally broken. To become whole, sometimes we have to make a choice to break open the old wounds that have been slowing us down. Over the years, I have found it amazing how our body adapts to pain. We learn to move forward with suffering. Adjusting... Continue Reading →